Ben and I have been through a lot since we first started dating. We have seen some very, very good times and we have also see some very hard times. I have hit "bottom" in my life several times. It always seems to continue to be ok. The famous poem about "The Footprints" comes to mind. Especially the line,
"The Lord replied, "My precious, precious child,
I love you and I would never, never leave you
during your times of trial and suffering.
"When you saw only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you."
Life has been very trying as of late. But as soon as I kneel down in prayer and ask, "What do you have planned for me now?" Something amazing comes up. Example is our move out here the first time, in June of 2010. It seemed like we were so stupid to come out here. We had good jobs, family, and were finally stable financially. The Lord was surely blessing us. Then I kept having the thought that Denver wasn't where we were supposed to be. The thought of moving out to Portland had been in my mind for sometime. I had just brushed it off for a long time. And then my daughter's step-mom had started to mention that if I was closer we could have visits where I come to their home and cook with Kira. (Her step-mom is an amazing cook). I again knelt in prayer and asked what to do.As soon as we started looking into moving, things seemed to start falling into place. Ben had been in an accident in August of 2009 and the insurance payment/settlement came in the mail. Then we started at looking at where to live. We found an amazing apartment for very little move-in costs in a great area. We agreed and gave our apartment management our 30 day notice. The move up was just as smooth. Once we moved to Vancouver, Ben accepted a fantastic job offer and I shortly followed with a great job of my own. We were doing very well and doing our best with what was given to us.
About 5 weeks after I started my job, Ben dropped to one day of work per week. I suddenly lost my job and the doubt and resentment of leaving Denver kicked in. We did our best and were able to live there for another few weeks before we were forced to move back to Denver.
We felt defeated and questioning why we went to Portland in the first place. We have since then begun to see the blessings of the initial move to Portland. In the short time we were there, we were able to make some amazing friendships with some very amazing people. Without those friendships, the move back out would have been impossible. When Ben recieved the call last month and was offered the full-time position, we first needed to figure out living arrangements. We had very little in savings and knew that it would take about 6 weeks before we could move into our new place. Our dear friends here in Portland stepped up big time. We have always had a place to stay, food in our bellies. We have made some deep friendships and know that Heavenly Father has the best for us in mind.
Driving around I am constantly reminded of the blessings in my life. I have a loving and supportive husband. I have a roof over my head. I have the most beautiful and smartest daughter. And above all, I have a loving Heavenly Father who watches over me and protects me daily. My love will never be able to be put into words. My love for Him.
"Count your many blessings, name them one by one... and it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.."
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