Dear Jen.

Jen,

What a crazy few months this has been. I heard that on Dec 11 you went out to get Christmas gifts, never made it back home, and then I hear today that there was a body found that might be yours. How can this have happened? What happened?

I have kept in contact with Remy, but it's been hard. I've done my best to keep thoughts positive and keep out hope that you would come home to your kids. There was a rumor that you had suddenly lost a lot of weight and stopped doing your amazing art work. What was going on? We used to talk all the time! I feel bad now for the days when we didn't talk.

You have been my strength these last 10 years. You were the ONE person I could go to and vent to about what was going on. You were there for me before, during and after the divorce. I was so happy to talk with you about how our kids were "getting so big" and all the changes in life. I was so happy to have found you online and chat with you late at night about life. Talk to someone who would listen to me ramble on and on.

I have said so many prayers asking for your to be safe. Asking Heavenly Father to comfort those that needed comforting during this time. And He has. I knew from the moment I heard you were missing that you were safe. I didn't understand why I felt that, but I did. Was it that you were safe in Heaven? That whatever wrong had happened, you were now safe and away from harm?

There was a thought going around that you had run off with another man. Really?! Do they not know you? Your life was for Remy and those kids. You were simply finally getting healthy and fit, and that's why the weight loss. Look at your husband! I wouldn't want to be fat either around him!

I just want to say this. I love you so much. I am so thankful to know you. I am thankful for our friendship. For the sincere love and appreciation you have given me. If you are up in Heaven, please watch over my babies. Keep them safe and teach them what an amazing mommy I am. When they get to Earth, they will know of you. They will know of your love and kindness. They will know of my friend that is always with me, no matter what.

I look forward to the day that we can talk again. I miss your hugs and your laugh.

I will see you soon, my friend.

Love,

S.

http://jenniferramsaran.blogspot.com/